After a long sabbatical, here comes another post....
There was a time, I was young… I had dreams, I had targets, I had goals… and like a bullet, searching for its destination, worked towards it. Since then, lot of water has flown under the bridge; today I am at a juncture, where I have grown older, yet more confused. I have achieved most of what I had targeted for myself, say five years ago, yet I am unsure of my priorities.
Is money, career, a prestigious job, self actualization be all and end all of life? Or is there more to life? When was the last time I did a deed which was kind, when was the last time I helped someone? When was the last time I showed kindness towards someone who does not mean anything personally to me? When was the last time I felt the kid inside me burning bright? Is there something inside me which is dying, or is it that it is already dead? The values, the traits, the ability to take risks which I have always treasured, are they being sacrificed for something which is more superfluous or something which is entirely selfish?
I understand life has to have a direction, but then life should also have a meaning. Everything comes for a price, and at some point of time I was willing to pay any price to achieve what I wanted to. But now that I look to be getting there, the questions resurface, was it a fair price, was it something I should have paid. Or have I exchanged good coffee in an ordinary mug for a bad coffee in a good looking mug? What is it that I want, the coffee or the mug?
Questions… there are questions. And there will always be questions, hopefully someday I shall find an answer, and shall be able to say again,”I have got my priorities right.” I can see a certain someone winking at me :)